Long Winded Very Personal Post

After so many wordless posts, today I feel like giving u a full long wordy entry. I have so much to say. If you’re not up for it then you can close your browser and go away now wtf. But if you didn’t read this you’d regret it trust me wtf.

DID I TELL YOU I’M GOING TO SEE SUGAH CANDY IN LESS THAN72 HOURS WEEEEEEEEEEEEEEEEE~~~***~~

Okay anyway I’m just done with a major spring cleaning and I’m exhausted. The skin on my hand is starting to peel because the detergent is so strong and I couldn’t find any gloves so what the heck. The last time I actually cleaned and scrubbed a whole house is already back in February when my friend came to stay over. Truth is, I’m a really clean person. My room and bathroom are always spotless so all I have to clean is the living room and the kitchen. My sister is another clean freak. She couldn’t even stand a little bit of hair lying around haih wtf and she irons her clothes every morning before she leaves the house. Me? I just put my crumpled dress on the bed and keep flattening it with my bare hands WTF Or if the dress is really really really wrinkled then i’d wear it on and then pull the end of the skirt up on the ironing board and just iron the hemline because with a straight hemline it’ll give an impression that the dress is ironed =D trust me it really works.

Oops. where was I.

Yah spring cleaning. So my other friend is coming to stay over my place now and the least I could do is to make sure the place is clean.

Someone told me I’m a very hard to please girl. Well, not only someone, is actually quite a handful of people who told me that. Really? Seriously? You really think I’m so hard to please?  If you give me 1 dollar worth of keropok lekor then you’re my best friend already wtf. I guess people said that because I’m sort of materialistic. Like if you give me expensive stuff than I’d be very happy wtf.  If you throw me a Chanel bag i’d hug you. haha vain wtf.

All this while I thought I’m a very smart person. Straight A student. Apparently not. This year I went through a couple of papers. And they suck to the max. Is it because I got out of school too long time ago hence my brain literally stopped working or I’m jusst not as smart as I think I am? To start with, I didn’t think my English is THAT bad. Like seriously. But I proved myself wrong. My infamous “today morning” haih. If you can’t tell what’s wrong with that, then your English is probably as bad as mine because the correct one should be “This Morning”. When I first said it, my sister laughed at me. Even after she laughed at me, I still didn’t know what’s wrong. In my defense, she’s always bullying me for nothing anyway. I guess I have to blame it on my English teacher Mr Quek haih wtf must be he taught me something wrong lah!

And can you tell that I’m the queen of procrastination? I actually have a lot of assignments to do but I haven’t started on anything my god seriously can someone please just give me one big slap so I’d go back to work and get everything done so I can have a peaceful Christmas?

Speaking of Christmas, the other day I went window shopping and nearly lugged home a 60 inch huge Christmas Tree. You know. like the real BIG HUGE ASS Christmas Tree that I can decorate with all sorts of bells and lights and an angel on the top of the tree so I could check under the tree every morning after I wake up for surprise Christmas presents that the Santa Clause drop off for me from the chimney. But then luckily sanity get the better of me and after thinking that I’d probably have to spend few hundred dollars on an useless tree. I walked away. Phew…

You know the amount of people around me who recently broke up? Sometimes it really pains me to see them suffering and abusing themselves. Sigh. We fight we break up we kiss we make up WTF. I’ve talked to them up to a point where I started to talk in a harsh manner more like scolding wtf because if scolding them would make them wake up and face the truth then I’d do that even if it means they’d hate me you know what I mean. When people are sad they just don’t care, they want you to be sad with them and when you scold them, they go all “aiya why u like that so inconsiderate. put yourselves in my shoes and u won’t say this” okay this? Put myself in your shoes? I have my own shoes okay. You think I’ve never gone through all of that like seriously? Have you any idea what I used to have to put up with up until the point that I get blocked from all possible communication routes and then dumped? So trust me when I say I know how it feels.

But out of the million things that you can admire me on..WTF, this is one of it, that I get out of relationship very steadily. When the first time it happens, I felt like it’s the end of the world. I couldn’t eat for almost a month, surviving on cookies and Milo that my friend make for me. Jes would remember what a useless piece of shit I was. I couldn’t remember how I got out of it. The next few time it happens, I’m okay. I didn’t know if i got used to it or something but I guess I just lost hope in people in general so I have no expectation whatsoever hence no disappointment. The last time it happened, I cried for 5 hours straight. Grace would remember that heh. Then I’m up and okay again the next day. I guess I learn to look at the bright side of things esp on a relationship. I wanted to live better after a relationship, be it for myself or for the lost significant other. I will never ever again be the girl who begs to get back together like how I did the first time. I realized that when things SHOULD happen, they WILL happen. So please, live better okay?

The other day I was chatting with Hwa on compromising. We were talking about having someone who love you more than you love him is better . Because then I wouldn’t have to spend every minute trying to please him.  I hate it when that happens. I channel all my energy pleasing that someone and then end up being someone even I myself hate. Like I would buy like 10 birthday presents for the person until I finally decided the best present to actually send out, and then threw the other 9 away. Isn’t that pathetic to start with? Or you think I’m so romantic so attentive?

Next week is Kek’s wedding. I’m so excited because I haven’t seen the girls in AGES like seriously AGES like don’t know how many YEARS okay. I didn’t have a chance to because every CNY they gathered on the 2nd day but that’s the day that I’m supposed to go over to my grandma’s so that’s why I always miss out haih I haven’t really gotten a white dress yet because Kek wanted everyone to wear white as the bridesmaid. I digged out all my dresses apparently I have sky blue dark blue black purple yellow lime green duck shit green also got wtf EXCEPT white. Okay actually I found 1 white one maybe I’ll wear just that.

Next week is also my birthday *ehem* =D Can you believe how fast the year flew by. Only last year I’m in Santa Clara and celebrated my birthday alone in Applebee’s in a 6 person table haih wtf I don’t know why the waitress put me ALONE sitting in a 6 person table and everywhere around me, people are all seated in gangs WTF I felt so left out and lonely but I didn’t care because it’s MY birthday and I ordered Oreo blended, Babyback Ribs and Mushroom soup. The waitress asked me if I’m sure with my order because they’re kind of huge and I answered sombongly No Problem I can Finish it but end up I left 3 quarter of my babybackribs and untouched mushroom soup on the table but I fninished my Oreo blended YUMMYYYYYYYYYYYYYY. haih. I didn’t tell them it’s my birthday just in case they bring me a slice of cake and sing me birthday song when I’m sitting ALONE in a 6 PERSON table with the whole restaurant staring at me WTF can u imagine that??! On the real US birthday day (wtf I celebrated once Msian time and once US time wtf so kiasu) I went fine dining at Alexander’s Steakhouse in Cupertino with my then significant other. Eh that’s my first fine dining in US okay don play play wtf but of course I made a fool of myself tons of times hopefully nobody realize..haha I think nobody realize lar but I’ll blog about that maybe later in another entry coz it deserves a whole entry to itself so you can laugh at me wtf because I’m such a dork WTF!!!

Seriously When I think of all the stupid things I did that day in Alexander’s I’m laughing to myself right now YOU CAN NEVER IMAGINE WHAT A KAMPUNG GIRL I AM YA ALLAH AHAHAHAHA MALUNYA AHAHAHA

I went out to fill my gas tank.

Let me tell you what happen.

There’s this afternoon when I was extremely tired, very super duper tired, so tired I can hardly lift my fingers, so tired I can’t walk, so tired I can’t breathe… okok you get the idea.

But my car gas tank is EMPTY and the red warning light has been blinking for a few weeks already. It’s practically going to dry off any minute. I didn’t want to wait until the next day to fill the tank because it would be really really jam in the morning.

So even though I was tired I still manage to drive out to the nearest gas station. I forgot to bring out my credit card. So I went to the cashier, paid 100 dollars. 

didadidadidadidadidadidadidadidadidadidadidadidadidadidadidadida

Everything settled and I drove home. When I reach home, I saw the red light still blinking and I thought to myself “hmm tomorrow need to fill the tank already”

“Wait.” 

“I thought I just went out to fill the tank?”

=(

Turns out I went out to gas station, paid 100 dollars, walked back to my car and drove off. WITHOUT LIFTING THE NOZZLE AND FILLING THE TANK.

WHY OH WHY TELL ME WHY I’M SO ABSENT-MINDED! I PAID BUT DID NOT DO ANYTHING AND DROVE HOME T____________________T

Why am I like that?

Gloria, my bad.

The other day, I drove to Watson’s because I needed to get more of this pill I’m taking.

After I took a bar of it, the man behind the Pharmacy counter asked if I’d like to get a whole box for 14 dollars instead since it’s going to cost me 50 cents less for every 4 tablets.

Fine. Good deal, so why not?

I proceeded to the counter to pay. The machine displayed 16 dollars.

“No. You must have made a mistake. The guy back there told me it’s 14.” I told the cashier.

“This box is 16 dollars. Which guy told you it’s 14?” He asked.

“The guy behind at the pharmacy counter told me it’s 14.”

“Which guy?”

“I don’t know the name. There’s only 1 guy there right.” I said, getting rather impatient.

“Let’s go over there and you show me who.” He offered.

Fine. Why not? It’s going to take me 5 seconds to walk over there and I can save 2 dollars.

“Him!” I exclaimed, pointing at that same guy behind the Pharmacy counter.

“Oh. You mean SHE?”

He just HAD to emphasize the “SHE”.

One glance at the name tag, “Gloria”.

Can you imagine how bad I make this woman Gloria felt? That I insisted it’s a HE? God please just kill me because at that very second I really felt like banging my head to the wall and bleed to death.

In my defense, she’s, well, not too well-endowed. She has a boy cut hair. She wore this big loose Watson’s t-shirt. So you really can’t put all the blame on me. BUT DAMMIT if next time someone insisted I’m a HE then how?

Starting from today imma wear skirts dresses frills and laces. haha.

Best of the best stupid thing I’ve ever done.

If you’d known me, you should be very well aware of what a klutz i am. The embarrassing events that happened all the time chagrined me.

Getting free money from strangers for my own groceries. Burning my kitchen when i cook instant noodle. Flooding the apartment because of the broken water pipe. Dropping my handphone into the mamak toilet bowl and scooping it out with bare hands, into the sea when i was fooling around at the beach, out of the roller coaster while screaming endlessly. Losing my Identification Card (still not found). Losing my purse (countless times).

Have i bore you enough with the details?

But what i found out today, tops all the clumsy things in the list. No doubt. Curious what could i have done?

I never bothered to check on the monthly credit card statements. I seldom go down to the nitty gritty details because the numbers are too much for me to handle.

End of Year 2005, I joined a gym. To avoid the trouble of membership cash payment, i resort to direct debit payment. I stopped going to The Gym 3 months later, and also assumed to have terminated membership.

Today, I was slightly free so out of boredom, I checked on my credit card statement. CIPTABU is the name of one of the items charged. I called Citibank to query about the actual merchant name. “Miss Joan, CIPTABU is the name of a Fitness merchant and it’s a monthly direct debit payment. Did you join any gym?” Obvious enough, I hung up and called The Gym instead.

They confirmed my active membership, and also confirmed my monthly payment for the last 2.5 years. Yes, you heard me correctly. I’ve been charged for The Gym membership for 2.5 years without me knowing. That’s a huge amount of money. In fact, it’s not even a matter of whether the membership fees are expensive or not, but it’s a matter of paying for something totally not worthy of it. I could have donated that few thousands dollars to WWF without regrets. But……this?

When i told Korej, his first reaction was “I seriously think you need a BoyFriend to help you with all this.”

Oh well. If you would excuse me, I’d like to go and wipe off my tears of bankruptcy.

giant boy

yesterday when i was shitting i browsed through all my handphone contacts and there’s this entry for “giant boy”. i spent almost 10 minutes (no kidding) thinking who giant boy is. turns out ahaha it’s this guy i met in giant hypermarket almost 1 month ago! okay so the story is like this. i went grocery shopping and took shitload of stuff like almost can flood my whole apartment that kind. after queuing up for what seems like half an hour it’s finally my turn at the cashier and then only i realize i didn’t bring my purse. yes no ID no License no Cash no Credit Card. and there’s like 10 more person behind me waiting with grumpy faces haiya i so embarassed la i wanted to just run away and hide. then this guy behind me offered to pay. AND YES HE DID PAY FOR ME and ask me for my number so i can pay him back later. but i asked for his instead coz i’m not comfortable giving out my number like that. so turns out, until now, i havent pay him back T____T i totally forgot about his good deeds, dont know why am i like that

today i have lazy hands lazy brains lazy everything i don’t want to write anymore. so let me just give u one of my songs that have been repeating in my iTunes. all emo songs haiya they don’t call me emo girl for no reason

better than sex what do you know. i can play this song on the piano pretty well now. if it’s not nice it’s only because i don’t have a grand piano dammit

Click Here for The Hills: A Night At The Opera

they used this song in The Hills also that’s why i love this episode the most. and I HATE JUSTIN BOBBY WTF why his hair like that and why he looks like he never bathed all his life and why did he kiss some other redhead in front of Audrina!!! and why Audrina gets into the car with him after that even though he cheated on her haiya how can she allow that? if my boyfriend was to grab someone else’s boobs in front of me, wtf…hmph……..err……….. wait i don’t even know how i would react to that.

1 more thing to add to my long list of crappiness

fuh i’m so emo now but i’m not gonna talk about it wtf

as though i’m not crappy enough that i have to be trapped in the elevator wtf and i thought my company has the best of everything wtf

seriously this is the 1st ever time i got trapped like why am i so unluckyyyyyyyyyyyyyy T_________T

this is the technician trying to push open the door but to no avail

and my friends are all enjoying me getting trapped that they all stood outside and asked if i need to write a will wtf and i already agreed to give my aircon and car away because that’s all the asset i have WTF

and i was trapped for a total of 40 minutes or so. luckily the ventilation is still working and i have enough oxygen

trust Jes to be the only one who stood outside all the time making sure that i’m alright and kept talking to me to make sure i’m still alive T______________________T <3

god are u done playing with me?

there’s a reason i quit drinking

the girls made jes a photo album. with all the photos taken of us from the first birthday party we celebrate together, to the first christmas party, first outing, first trip, till now. everything from the last 3 years. all the memories sigh

shu is very artistic she made the words. pretty right.

and why la why take the ugliest photo of me and put so damn big ya allah i always have to have bad hair cut before every trip sigh why is my hairstylist so mean to me pfft

jes u better bring this EVERYWHERE you go!!!!

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we went bowling on friday itself. my scores sucks shit but what do you expect right i was wearing a skirt way too short and way too loose

and out of the many many many bowling balls there jes had to pick the HEAVIEST to camwhore with sigh that ball is the heaviest like seriously u can almost see all our veins popping out

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ok you’d wonder why i’m wearing the same shirt same skirt from pool to bowling to dinner to segas. it was all on the same friday where i don’t have a laptop to work with lol

and..i got pulled into the club right after dinner without even changing first boo i wore office clothes to club without SHOWER pfftttttttt T____________________T maybe not as bad as the last time where i wore shorts and slippers supposedly to mamak but ended up in the club also wtf. i don’t even know why the bouncer let me in wtf

bubu is Mr Heineken lol

and the photos below..once and for all wtf don ever EVER bring up friday night again please pretty please

me, shu, jane, jes <3 .. pey where are you

and jes kept complaining shu doesn’t have a stable hand and took charge. but the photos jes took is even more blur than shu’s lol maybe there’s just not enough lighting in the washroo. excuse excuse wtf

no one has started drinking yet because we just got in. too busy taking photos that is..

bubu, linus, cheeyee. doing what i dont know. i think…i already started drinking by that time coz i didn’t notice all these photos taken also

bubu and i

the girls <3 pey where are you!

FatBoySlim is having the time of his life wtf dancing away like nobody’s business lol

i think..this is the beginning of the series of humiliation wtf

giving JaneDiva some loveeeeee

bubu and shan copying all FatBoySlim’s dance move lol and i’m the off one don’t know doing what

LOL linus what are u doing!!!

shu and linus doing their thing lol you didn’t see me in any of the photos because i was..well..urm…not there T_______________T

and then i started kissing Jes. jes u very lucky eh? LOL wtf

CheongSiak was jealous we were kissing and he kiss Linus too wtf and Shu & Jane

and then

sorry no more photos because i was..well…uhm…not there….wtf

that’s the consequences of bringing an alcoholic out wtf but thanks for the drinks anyway guys. but can u all make sure there’s water on the table next time because i tend to get thirsty wtf why am i like that T_____________________T

washington fuji

today when i was driving back from dance practice, suddenly there’s this car with 2 chinese guy inside driving very close to me on my left side. so i thought they’re trying to give me a piece of their mind because i’m driving rather slowly like at 40km/hr. i ignored them but they’re still going at the same speed with me and i can feel they kept looking at me. i know i’m pretty and all but there’s seriously no need to do so (wtf) i looked over and gave them the super tulan face i can ever squeeze out of myself. they then start to honk me like repeatedly. are u freaking kidding me chinese boy. so i gave them the ultimate middle finger wtf then they started to point in front and then point at their lane.

turns out they’re actually good people trying to tell me i’m driving on the opposite side of the road -_-”

seriously if i was in their place, if u think i would still try to save your pathetic little ass after u showed me your one finger salute. think again.

this has got to top the dumbest thing i’ve done whole week wtf

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anyway YES i’m back to dancing all revived now wtfand we have a new studio now. there’s a church downstairs and the studio is actually the church’s. they made it for sean so we could practice there weee

i did not have a photo but here’s a random accidental video taken at the studio of sean playing a fool lol coz the choreograph is for girls wan kot..but we’re..just..damn…lazy…

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washington apple is the SHITZ now i tell you i thought fuji apple is the best but sorry fuji, u’re no where near washington.

but this is like 2 bucks per apple okay !!! i’m going bancrupt. linus said this is like 30 cents in US wtf

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JY’s Lily! the guys too free okay keep taking the flowers and play around

i did take one with the lily but i look like all kinds of shit so i’m not going to post it up boo

how stupid can i be

a quick one before i leave for shu’s place

the stupidest thing happened to me today.

i usually dont use alarm clocks. i’m quite a light sleeper and even a slightly louder breathing is enough to wake me up.

and for me, i depended on my housemate’s early morning toilet visits as a wake up call. today, i heard the toilet door closing right outside my door and sounds of water flushing down.

i woke up, switched off the air-con, groaned in disbelief because it seems as if i haven’t slept at all, selected my iTunes fave playlist and started playing, and went in for shower.

half way through i realize it’s saturday. for god’s sake, it’s saturday!!! what am i doing it’s an off day omg

so i turned off the tap, dressed back in pajamas, and went back to sleep.

crap.

i made a total fool out of myself

i had business lunch with my boss, my customer, my customer’s boss, my vendor. yah basically all the big shots

eargh i thought i get to eat free but they split out the bills wtf i jsut ate like a tiny little bit but i have to pay like 16 bucks wtf

when the bill came, the total was 80 bucks for 5 person. i did the calculation in my mind and then blurted out loud “13 bucks” and feel triumphant thinking i damn smart la coz everyone else is still sitting there right

everyone looked at me and my boss softly said “i think it should be 16 bucks”

at that second i wish i could take off my boss’s belt and hang myself in the restaurant right there and then. my customers would think what a total idiot i am can’t even do simple calculation wtf

T___________T why am i like that